I constantly pass them in 

These elegant streets, 

The glarers and disdainers. 

Every now and then 

The temptation becomes overwhelming: 

I sidle up to one and 

Present a delicately engraved 

Cream envelope, tastefully advising 

'An Invitation'. 

The contents?? 

A crisp hundred dollar bill 

And a note that reads: 

"So you can wash your mind out 

With soap now made 

Affordable to the 

Most miserly."